“I just don’t feel right. I don’t feel like my old self. What’s happening to me? Am I in Perimenopause”
These were the exact words I spoke to my husband a few years ago when I was trying to figure out what was going on with my body and mind.
I had gone from being an organised person with a sharp mind to a vague and confused dizzy lady who found it hard to remember what she was doing from one moment to the next. I would walk into a room and stand, looking around vaguely, trying to remember what I had come in for. Goldfish brain was definitely the operative word.
Who put this random bottle of wine in my trolley?
Strange things would happen to me. I often found items in my supermarket trolley that I had no recollection of putting in. I knew I must have chosen them, but I had absolutely no memory of it. It was like having a phantom shopper adding surprises at the checkout.
I found items in the fridge that totally didn’t belong there. I lost and misplaced things. I stumbled over words and forgot old friend’s names. I actually started to wonder if I had some kind of early-onset dementia [and scared myself to death by googling it!}
And there were other strange symptoms too. Old injuries flared up. An old ankle fracture from 20 years ago suddenly started to ache. The small of my back started to feel stiff and I got a literal pain in the butt which made me hobble about when I got up in the morning. I started to feel like a rickety old lady. I felt like I had changed overnight from a fit youngish person to a frail 90-year-old.
This was what gave me the clue that maybe there was more to this than sudden and dramatic overnight ageing. Maybe it was something to do with the fabled Menopause. At that time I didn’t have any of the classic symptoms such as hot flashes so it took me a little while to figure out what was going on. Maybe I was a little in denial too.
However, when I put two and two together I understood and accepted what was happening. This was Perimenopause!. It was actually a relief to realise that I wasn’t going mad and that there was also something I could do about it…
What is Perimenopause? Am I in Perimenopause?
Perimenopause is simply the period of time when your fertility starts to decline. It can start anytime between 40 and 58 but the average age is 51.5 years old.
What I didn’t realise was that the language around menopause is very confusing. When we say “I’m going through Menopause” what we are probably referring to is Perimenopause.
What? Menopause lasts a day?
Menopause itself is defined as the moment when a woman has gone a full year without having a period. So you are through menopause in the blink of an eye and are then defined as Post-Menopausal. Menopause itself literally lasts a day.
Its the damn Perimenopausal transition period that’s the tricky bit!.
So Perimenopause is the time period when our sex hormones, oestrogen and progesterone decline and fluctuate. It’s not a calm controlled decline either. Hormones are fluctuating up and down like a crazy wild rollercoaster and that is what causes some of the more unpleasant side effects of the transition.
Perimenopause can last anywhere between 5 to 10 years. Some women will sail through it smoothly but others will have to cling on for dear life through the toughest storms and wild waters before reaching the calm on the other side of transition.
Why it’s important to know when you are in Perimenopause
The short answer is “So you don’t think you are losing your mind!”
Before I realised what was happening to me I truly thought I was going mad. I didn’t feel like myself at all and this started to affect all areas of my life including my relationships and family, my work and other areas of my health.
I believe that knowledge is power. Once I understood what was happening I could stop worrying, and then take steps to improve the situation {some of which I will share with you below}.
I understood that the aches and pains, anxiety, insomnia, weight gain, disappearing libido and memory issues were all parts of the jigsaw and could be improved.
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